I just took the Google Train to Weirdsville


I don’t know what just happened to me.

What I’m about to tell you actually just happened. I promise none of it is made up.

Let me set the scene: I’m at the Google Pixel launch in London, in a cool warehouse space. So far, so average day for this hipster dude.

I’m waiting to check out the Daydream View demo. I’ve got half an hour to go, so I’m told to go and try out the ‘commute train ride’ up on another platform.

There’s nothing out of the ordinary so far, as ‘experiences’ to try out new features of a phone or gadget are pretty normal at press launches, placing them in their optimum context to properly show them off.

So I assume I’m about to go on a whirlwind tour of the new elements of the Pixel phone, all the great things it can do in some new and creative form. I’m intrigued, as this looks like a pretty big set up.

Google Train
Everything seems normal so far. Probably going to see some cool new navigation stuff.

I head up some stairs and into a ‘station’. It’s a little train track with the London Underground sign ‘re-imagined’ with the Google logo. I’m told the train will be here in a moment but there’s some ‘congestion’ on the line.


Suddenly a trolley emerges from behind a curtain, being pushed by a Google rep. On the trolley are two footstools, with wireless headphones on each.

The chap at the entrance to the ‘experience’ asks me what I like to listen to on my commute home. I tell him a little bit of EDM, because I am (as already explained) one helluva dude.

He looks a touch perplexed, telling me that might not possible.

‘How about jazz, pop, classical?’ he posits.

I confirm pop is fine. I’m told to get on a stool. I do so.

Google Train
OK. This is a strange train. But it’s cool. I’ll probably be alright.

‘OK GOOGLE, PLAY SOME POP!’ Yells the fellow who took my music choice. And we’re off!

I’m wheeled around a corner, lights blinding me slightly, with some jazzy piano music playing in my ears. What’s it going to be like? Will this be some sort of Google take on the haunted house? Will I be scared? Will I jump out of my skin or be dazzled by the future as presented by one of the biggest companies on the planet?

There’s a man. Playing a piano. He’s playing the music I’m listening to. He’s very good at piano, I note, as we wheel past.

‘OK, you can exit through the curtain on your left!’ I’m told, as we grind to a halt.

Wait… what? That’s it?